Is there something about medical restraints and Valentine's Day that we should know? We kick off this week's birthday celebration with Stephanie Leonidas, who once found herself cleave gagged and cuffed down naked (with strategically-placed towels) in a slightly creepy episode of Defiance. But then there's Madison Iseman, who as the title character in I Know Where Lizzie Is got to spend some time in the very same restraints. Coincidence? Okay, probably.
On February 15, celebrated actress Jane Seymour turns 70. Her post tie in Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman was plenty iconic, but for this list we had to go with Memories of Midnight, which found her tied up in a tight skirt and even tighter detective gag in front of a boiler rigged to explode...oh, the humanity! Sharing the day is Megan Dodds, who deserves a mention even if her cleave gag scene in CSI: NY was all too brief.
After a quiet couple days, the birthday bus comes barreling back with a vengeance on February 18, with Cybill Shepherd in the driver's seat. Despite some stiff competition, there was never any doubt about which scene we'd be selecting for this list: it has to be her comedic turn as an extremely pissed off, cleave-gagged bride in the most famous episode of Moonlighting's entire run. And for more '80s fun, let's hear it for Molly Ringwald, shown here in a tasty piece of cheese called Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone, from just before Sixteen Candles happened and she didn't have to do that sort of thing anymore.
The 18th continues with Genelle Williams, who once gave us a short but sweet duct tape scene in an episode of Chosen, and with Maiara Walsh, whose intense ordeal in VANish does have a happy ending, just in case you were wondering. That brings us to newly-minted thirtysomething Melise, and while we're tempted to edit down her scene from Presumed Dead in Paradise a bit more at some point, maybe you won't mind so much for now?
If you thought the 18th was crowded, get a load of the day after. The 19th arrives with a 55th birthday for Justine Bateman, and to those who say "no gag?" to The Fatal Image, we can only respond with, "red minidress." Meanwhile, Jessica Tuck's lone full-treatment scene in Scorpion may have edited down to less than 20 seconds, but we couldn't pass it up.
As dusk settles on the 19th, rumor has it that some sort of underground cleave-gag party might be afoot. Perhaps you know Bellamy Young from The Cottage? (No, not that The Cottage...but it's still pretty good.) Arielle Kebbel drops by with her scene from Outlaw Trail: The Treasure of Butch Cassidy, and even though there's a guy involved, everyone but the most determined putz-hater is forced to admit that it's pretty cute. Ophelia Lovibond (whose name we enjoy to the extreme) says "Oh yeah?" and drops a clip from A Single Shot. And just as we fear that the night might be winding down, Victoria Justice (okay, that's not a bad name either) takes a quick break from being everywhere at once to show up with her big AOH scene from Eye Candy.
Then the dream police arrive, because, in a pandemic year, this sort of weird fantasy gathering is completely inappropriate.
On Saturday the 20th, everyone wakes up in need of ibuprofin but otherwise refreshed and Zoom-calls Tracy Spiridakos to say, "Damn, grrrl, nice job on that scene in Revolution where you got tied up in front of the crossbow. That looks like it took a lot of work." And the world spins madly on.